shut up. show up. LISTEN {the art of conversation} Yes it's back to the basics

Published Wednesday, July 06, 2011 by jodi renee | E-mail this post

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My time is valuable and YOU are important to me.
So I want to savour my time and focus on what I need to do to get to where I'm going
So that when I'm in front of you, or on the phone. I can give you ...all of me.
Or what's the point?
half ass friendships? and mediocre relationships?
How we do one thing is how we do everything.
And I want to 'show up'
for me.
And then for the people in my life.
I want to give ME all of my focus, time and commitment
so that I can give YOU the same.

Communication and conversation...it's a part of who I am. It's in all of us to want to connect.
I recently finished the book "Fierce Conversations" in which Susan Scott brilliant states:
"The conversation IS the relationship"
How profound...
And sadly...REAL conversation is what most of us are avoiding.
Real communication is about hearing what the other is NOT saying just as much, if not more, than what is being said.
True listening.
Deep.
Raw.
Honest.
Meaningful conversations.
(annnd yea...the ones that change people, often come jam packed with discomfort...) Woo!

You can use the excuse that we live in a technology world and that's life.
You've also just defined what's important to you.
and who's not.
The most valuable and precious thing you can give someone is ...your time
Your focused and attentive...curious and caring TIME.

People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel ~ Maya Angelou

I recently ran with a friend of mine who chatted the whole time...
about...
everyone else.
Not inspiring and uplifting chat either. Toxic gossip.
I felt like I was running live stream with Entertainment Tonight.
On the phone with a friend who replied "oh that sucks" ...however if she was listening, would have replied "that's awesome!"
Or how about the two of you that sit there on your phones all night...texting.
Talking/typing to everyone else and not each other.

When was the last time you truly listened to someone?
Without interruption? Without interjecting your own story?
Without constantly checking your phone?
When was the last time you walked away from a conversation feeling empowered, changed...inspired?
Do you only send birthday wishes on Facebook or do you send a card in the mail?
When life changes are happening to those that mean the most to you -- do you Blackberry message them or actually pick up the phone to say "What goes on in your life is important to me. I'm taking the time to give you the most important thing I have ...my time."

I believe it's so easy to make people feel important.
It's really as simple as giving them ...your time.
You.

A leader, successful business CEO, champion of anything...and a true friend cannot get excellent results by 'half assing'.
Great and successful anything requires ALL OF YOU.

So if you want to have amazing friends, and unbelievably successful relationships.
BE that amazing...
Shut up.
Show up
and LISTEN.
(and once in a while pay homage to Alexander Graham Bell...you know? the phone! And here's another tip...there's a good ROI when you shut your Blackberry off for date night fellas! heeey!)

love ...jodi renée

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